THE ROAD TO RECOVERY
The MA module I’m currently working on is about creating an
online presence as a writer. I therefore
resolved, among other things, to update my blog on a weekly basis and to make
it less like a journal and more reader interactive. I still intend to do that, but at the moment
life has thrown me a challenge that I have to work around.
Of the many metaphors used to talk about life I think the
road one is the most apt. It is
certainly useful in describing my life - detours, wrong turns, potholes,
straying off the path, trying to get back on track, etc. At the moment I am on what is referred to as
the road to recovery - and everyone I have spoken to has told me it is going to
be a long road. Why is it that the road
to happiness is never a long one? It
seems like we get glimpses of pure joy before we start toiling up the next
hill, we have moments of happiness before we take a wrong step and fall off the
road (which is, of course situated at the top of a damn mountain we have to
climb back up), but it often feels like the good journeys are sprints and the
hard ones are marathons.
In high school I took a typing class - that was before computers,
in the days of manual typewriters - which has proven very useful over the
years. Usually I’m a very fast ten
finger typist. Currently I’m a very slow
five finger typist. Usually I can type
for hours before my tendonitis or carpal tunnel kicks in and pain slows me
down. Currently I can barely get through
an hour on my lap top before my shoulder and arm are throbbing; even though I’m
not typing with my right hand that arm is affected - in fact you would be
surprised how many bodily functions and everyday activities involve the muscles
(which, of course, are wrapped around the bones) of your upper arm and
shoulder. Usually if I’m unmotivated or
have writer’s block I would go for a quick walk and get some fresh air, or do
some yoga or other physical activity that would help me to settle down and concentrate
on the work I need to do. Currently
anything physical is challenging to impossible, and nothing is quick. I walk with the agility and confidence of an
eighty year old - I’m absolutely terrified of another fall, small chores drain
my energy, and taking a shower is a major task that requires a couple of extra
strength Tylenol before commencing.
So, I am on the road to recovery, the path to obtaining a
masters degree, the trail of earning of a living, the avenue of dreams, and the
highway of life. Can I travel all these
thoroughfares at the same time? I can
and will, but experience has taught me that I won’t be able to give them all
equal attention. I have to make a living,
but I may have to delay going back to work until I’m more fit. I am going to earn my MA Professional
Writing, but I may not get the distinction I would dearly like. I am going to achieve my dream of being a
writer; nothing is going to make me lose sight of that. Right now, though, the track I need to give
the most attention to is restoring my health and mobility; if I don’t attain
that I will never accomplish my other goals.
I am still travelling the highway of life - I have come to
another detour (I’ve never actually stumbled across a shortcut, such as the job
of my dreams being handed to me on a silver platter, or buying the winning
lottery ticket) - but I am not defeated, in fact I am still damn defiant!
